“Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans”.

Welcome to the first ever blog post from thehonestwoman!

It takes a huge amount of courage for me to bare my soul in this public forum and it is important you understand why I am doing so.  I am a writer so expression in this forum seems natural to me.  I have personally experienced body shame, sexual abuse, violence in all its forms as well as having lived my life as part of a minority group in my identity as a Lesbian.  I am a mother, have been a long term partner, am a widow and now am finding who I am and my wish is that in doing so and sharing my stories others who have struggled in ways I have and still do at times – will find their courage to be the Goddesses they were born to be.  Some of my blog may be in your face, may offend you that is not my intention.  It is raw and real and honest as I am.  And through my journey I have become aware of the need for conversation that is challenging and confronting.   “Nothing grows inside a comfort zone”.  I hope this inspires dialogue for you too to live as the honest woman – whoever she is in your soul and to with power step outside of that which is your comfort zone!

As women we need to uphold, uplift and empower each other to be exactly who we each are.  To be authentic.  Part of who we are is our sexuality and our sensuality.  We are often too quick to judge and shame our sisterhood. This is partly the reason I have started this blog.  The other is that I am just friggin funny apparently so you should get a laugh along the way.   Buckle up and join me for the ride. I don’t do boring.

As I have arrived into peri menopause my sex drive has gone through the roof – I see that as a very pleasant side effect of this life stage!  I have always been a highly sexed  woman  – always fantasised and had strong desires.  But it has only been in the past couple of years I have been truly brave.  I have stepped into a realm that is new to me, the realm of the heterosexual.   As an overweight woman in her late 40’s who has spent her life identifying as a fully exclusive Lesbian, I began an unexpected journey to “come out straight”.

It all started when I had a random but smokin’ HOT encounter with a man late one night in the central city.   After way too much beer and flirting we started kissing and fuck me could he kiss!  I was astonished as I truly did not believe men could kiss well.  It had never entered my head.  I had made an assumption that only women knew how to kiss like demons of pleasure.  This man could kiss.  Like instant energy shoots to clitoris kiss.  He floored me.  I could not get enough of him.   And after hot and passionate kissing our hands wildly exploring each other like possessed people,  he went down on me as I stood firmly pushed against a wall of a video store on a public road at 4am.  Such was the carnal delight mixed with alcohol haze that I had no idea we were on a public street!  We both came hard.  Me in his mouth.   Colours swirled and in that glorious orgasmic moment – I went through a sexual paradigm shift.   One that I had never predicted.

I knew I could pull off sexy even with poor self body image.  I signed on to an online dating site and claimed my right as a woman to be both sexy and powerful.  To choose to just ‘fuck’ if I wanted to solely for the pleasure it gives me!    To be honest about how I truly feel and what I am discovering along the way.  Boy do I have some stories to share.  So, I invite you to follow my blog and if you like it share it.  Maybe there will be something you can relate too along the way.  If I make you as woman feel positive about yourself and increase your desire to treat yourself more exquisitely,  if I make you laugh or make you want to have more passionate hot sex – it has to be a good thing.  Me, I’m sure as hell having fun!   Stay posted sisters.

thehonestwoman